Tag: Julep
I Love You, You Love Me
…We’re a happy family…
Admit it, you sang it in your head, too.
I can’t help but think of that big, ugly purple dinosaur when I look at my fingernails. They’re just so…purple…
I used Julep “Rosa” – Amethyst for February on top of Julep “Elle”. Honestly, I’m not in love with this paint job. I screwed up my thumbnail and the glitter got covered with the purple and the glitter doesn’t look right. I need either a darker glitter over the dark base or a lighter base to go with the light glitter. “Rosa” looked a lot better over a lighter color on my toes a few weeks ago.
March Julep Maven Box
I am supposed to be an “It Girl”, but I haven’t actually gotten an “It Girl” box since the first month I joined.
This month, I actually picked the “Core Classics” box, because I couldn’t stand ANY of the colors in ANY of the Julep box combinations. This month’s theme was “the Riviera Collection” and all of the colors looked like the pastel colors you’d see on Country Club golfers. And NO glitter. I also wasn’t interested in an exfoliating lip buffer.
The “Core Classics” box has Freedom Polymer Topcoat (so popular that it often sells out), Oxygen Nail Treatment (I don’t even know what that means) and a nail cleaning tool, which I already happen to have. C’est la vie…at least there was some candy in the box.
Hoping for something better next month…
Not a Julep Maven? CLICK HERE to join! Your first box is free with code FREEBOX!
The Rusty Trombone
Behold…THE RUSTY TROMBONE.
If you don’t know what a Rusty Trombone is, I am not going to be the one to tell you. Go ask your kid or something, you old fuddy duddy.
There are many layers to this manicure. The first layer is Sally Hansen Nail Prisms in “Amber Ruby.” It was the closest thing to rust that I had. The second coat is Julep “Glenda” – a creamy silver crackle. Since trombones are usually made of brass, I used Milani 3D Holographic “510” as the third layer. (WTF Milani?)
After 3 coats, my nails were super gooey, so I topped with a coat of Sally Hansen “Diamond Flash Quick Drying Topcoat.” It’s been over 5 hours and I don’t feel like the polish has cured. Hmmm…this rusty trombone might not last long…
Rita Royale
I couldn’t decide which new filthy experiment to do with my nails last night, so I decided to be lazy and try out one of my new Julep polishes – “Rita Royale.”
Doesn’t “Rita Royale” sound like a used up 70s porn star?
I was excited to see how well the polish matched my car – SQUEE!
Everybody Wins
Another day, another surprise in my mailbox.’
I tried to resist, but I only made it about 3 days until I decided that I had to buy $25 of Julep goodies to get their Oscar “Gift with Purchase.” The set was called “Everybody Wins” and comes with a gold sequined clutch (lined with leopard!) and 2 polishes. There were actually 2 sets – both come with “Oscar”gold glitter, but “Holly Would” comes with a holly green frost and “Rita Royale” comes with royal blackcurrant shimmer. (Whatever, it’s fucking fuchshia.)
To get these goodies, I purchased “Party’s Over”, a special glitter polish removal system. Basically little caps that hold a remover pad of the finger. I also got “Glenda” – a- silver crackle topcoat. I know crackle is so 2012, but I wanted it…
My total – $25.39. Like a boss.
I’m a Bad Influence
As she was painting my toenails, my daughter Lily told me that she “wants to be a fingernail painter when she grows up.” Sigh. Way to aim high. To be fair, I’m fairly certain that she thinks that my job is being a fingernail painter. That’s pretty much all I do these days.
But before she painted my toes, Lily painted her own toenails and fingernails.
She picked out Julep “Kristy” and “Lindy” for her toes.
She picked out Julep “Libby” and “Geo” for her fingernails.
She has picked that combination before – she really likes turquoise-y fingernails.
That girl knows what she wants.
I hope she gives me a discount when she is a famous fingernail painter.
Grenade
My son was having a sleepover for his birthday last night, so I threw myself on the grenade of trying to keep Lily out of their hair all evening. I decided on a Mani/Pedi Party in my bedroom. She did her nails…and then started looking at me.
Not only did I let her pick the polishes…I let her paint my toenails, too. She chose Julep “Joanna” and “Rosa” – Amethyst for February. Good job, Lily!
She did a pretty decent job for a 5 year old. To be fair, I did scrape off most of the extra in the shower this morning – there was half an inch or so extra around the edges of my toenails…but those who know me, know that they look like that when I paint them, too.
The Shocker Mani
I think I’ve found my signature “look.”
It’s called the “Shocker” Mani.
Why is it called the “Shocker” Mani?
THIS is why.
I used Julep “Coco” and “Nan” on the bottom coat and Julep “Jane” on top.
Now I can flash the “Shocker” everywhere…at home, at work, at school functions, at the grocery store…
Beatrix was a Bitch
It seriously took me nearly an hour and a half to get “Beatrix” off my nails.
Julep glitter is some serious shit. Zoya polish remover is the best I’ve used…and it still took forever.
Never fear, I ordered Julep’s glitter remover – It’s aptly named “Party’s Over”….but it won’t be here for another week.
Inside a Hoarder’s Purse
So I switched purses the other day…I didn’t quite realize the extent of the lipgloss hoarding situation that was going on inside of my purse…they were all stashed in a zipper pocket on the front of my old purse, but my new purse didn’t have the same pocket…what do I do?
WHAT DO I DO?
Surprisingly, I couldn’t find a makeup bag at home that would work – they were all either too big or too small. (My mom was addicted to Clinique and Estee Lauder “Gift with Purchase” – but she would end up giving half of the shit to my sister and I.) Then I remembered a mini Estee Lauder bag that I had stashed at work. I had been using it as an emergency vaginal care kit, but hey – what’s more important? Lipgloss or panty liners?
I was planning on listing the names of all the lipglosses in my purse, but the names wore off long ago. Boo. Most are Liplicious from Bath & Body Works, so just use your imagination and think of a name yourself.