Category: Hair

 
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Disco Bum Bum Haul

Don’t come at me for spending $64 on sunscreen, just because you know I never go outside anyway…for those few occasions I do step into the sunlight, I want to be assured that I don’t burst into flames AND smell good, so I decided to try out Sol de Janeiro Rio Radiance SPF 50 Body Spray ($32). and I thought my Lala would like it, too. I’ll let you know how it goes the next time I get to visit the farm.

Tell me why I paid $2.49 (down from $4.99) for essence My Heart Beats Disco Glitter Switch Liquid Lipstick? Because it’s a better formula than Urban Decay’s Vice Liquid Lipstick “Trap Queen” ($18) which was basically the same concept?

It was free Ulta gift with purchase time, so I got another Ulta Ultra Slim Brow Pencil in “Dark Brown” ($11) and Ulta Weightless Water Lip Stain in “Sangria Splash” ($11 – I think this is the only color I didn’t have already) to meet the $19.50 threshold. I chose the coral flowered bag, which contained an Eye Shadow Palette; Matte Lip Cream; Shiny Sheer Lip Gloss; Inner Glow Eye Primer; Soft Glow Poreless Face Primer; New Heights Mascara; an Eye Shadow Brush and Makeup Sponge. I kind of hate that they don’t put the lippie color anywhere on these packages – what if I wanted a buy a full size?

There were a lot of other freebies when I placed this order, too. I got a free Sol de Janeiro Bum Bum Cream with the $40 purchase above. I got a free 13 Piece Clean Ingredient Sampler with $85 shipped purchase, which came with Sol de Janeiro Beija Flor Elasti-Cream (cannot really smell it until I fully recover from the ‘rona); Good Molecules Yerba Mate Wake Up Eye Gel; Manyo Pure & Deep Cleansing Foam; belif The True Cream; Peach Slices Snail Rescue Intensive Wash-Off Jelly Mask (I’ll save for Lily, since she uses this brand); NOYZ Sh**ty Day; Peach & Lily Retinal For All Renewing Serum (keeping for myself); Living proof. Perfect hair Day high-shine gloss; Vanicream Gentle Face Cleanser; Drunk Elephant Lala Retro Whipped Cream; Briogeo Farewell Frizz; Innersense Sweet Spirit Leave In Conditioner; and Drunk Elephant T.L.C. Framboos Glycolic Night Serum. I also got a free mystery gift with…I have no idea what I bought that gave me this. The mystery gift mostly dumb card samples: tarte Creaseless Creamy Concealer; Clinique Moisture Surge Active Glow Serum; Milk Makeup Hydro Grip Gel Tint; Ilia Barrier Build Skin Protectant Cream; Yves Saint Laurent Y; Tiffany & Co. Rose Gold (I actually have the full size, so I ain’t mad); and NYX The Face Glue Gripping Primer.

Since I splurged, I used the remaining $53 in Ulta points I had built up, as well as a $3.50 off $15 coupon, so I got all this for about $32.

Around $710 to Diamond in 2026…can I do this?

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Bling Bling Black Honey Ulta Haul

Why yes, that is a super blinged out Clinique Limited Edition Almost Lipstick in “Black Honey”. It was 50% off ($15.50) in this month’s Diamond Love List and my last one was down to a stub, so I JUMPED on it. That was the only thing that I wanted this month…but then I found some other things…

I was in the mood for more bougie bath stuff, so I decided to try out Sol de Janeiro Bom Dia Bright Clarifying AHA BHA Body Wash ($26). It has a little salicylic acid, along with the all the other good stuff and it will help clear up my summer bacne. I sprung for the Sol de Janeiro Limited Edition Perfume Mist Discovery Set ($34), which was kinda dumb in retrospect. I already had 62 and 48. I wanted the 40 to match the body wash, but it isn’t as good as the body wash and 87 is weird, too. Sigh. I guess I cannot be too mad, because I used $50 in Ulta points.

My daughter is into dry shampoo and MONDAY Haircare Brunette Dry Shampoo ($7.99) is cheaper than Batiste or Not Your Mother’s, so I wanted her to try it. I also needed more Unbound Jelly ($18) for…stuff.

In addition to using $50 in Ulta points and a $3.50 off $15 coupon, I got two gifts with purchase! I got Platinum & Diamond Exclusive Free 17 Piece Gift with $85 purchase, which included Good Molecules Pimple Patches (giving to Lily); Redken Control Hairspray; Polite Society Greatest Lashes of All Time Mascara; NOYZ 12:00 eau de parfum; CHI Infra Silk Infusion; Kenra Moisture Shampoo & Conditioner; Eau Thermale Avene Cicalfate Serum; Olaplex No. 4 Shampoo and No. 5 Conditioner (YASSSS); Dolce & Gabbana Devotion; philosophy dose of wisdom dark circle brightening cream; Briogeo Don’t Despair, Repair; Stila Liquid Lipstick in “Mute”; Lolavie Glossing Detangler (saving for my Barbies); Drunk Elephant B-Hydra Intensive Hydration Serum; and pixi Glow Tonic (I have so much of this). I also qualified for a Diamond Member Exclusive! Free 11 Piece Sampler with $100 purchase, that included St. Moritz Tanning Mousse (giving away); le mini macaron Nail Cleanser Pads (pretty sure they are just alcohol wipes); Half Magic Face Gems (hello Gwen Stefani in the late 90s); Olaplex No. 6 Bond Smoother (trifecta!); megababe The Geo Deo (going in my travel bag); Estee Lauder Advanced Night Repair; COSRX The 6 Peptide Skin Booster Serum; Living proof. restore conditioner (but no fucking shampoo?); philosophy dose of wisdom bouncy skin reactivating serum; r.e.m. beauty On Your Collar Classic Lipstick in “Lingerie”; and it Cosmetics Hello Results Wrinkle Reducing Daily Retinol Serum-in-a-Cream. WoW! My skin is excited.

Just $762 to Diamond in 2026.

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Butt Stuff Ulta Haul

How can I NOT buy a product called Butt Stuff?

Look, I’m 49 years old and have birthed two children. I don’t need to draw a diagram of how that fucks up your body, especially the no-no square. I have not yet had a flare-up, so I haven’t gotten to use megababe Butt Stuff Hemorrhoid Cream ($22.40, down from $28) yet. You will be the FIRST to know how it goes…

In addition to restocking on Sol de Janeiro Brazilian Joia Strengthening + Smoothing Shampoo and Conditioner ($26 each), I added a few fun things to my cart. I’ve never read a single page or watched a single frame of Twilight, but I got a Twilight: New Moon x Colourpop Multichrome Shadow Stix in “It’s Always Been Him” ($12) because the color was extra pretty. I tried it and I like it – but it is a whole lotta green for my face. I also picked up Holo Taco “Milky White Shimmer” ($14) because why not?

All this was enough for a free 13 piece beauty bag with my $90 purchase. In addition to the canvas drawstring beauty bag, I got Oak Essentials Moisture Rich Balm (in a weird burlap bag?); Pureology Strength Cure Shampoo and Conditioner (I love a matching set); Gaultier Divine; Caroline Herrera Very Good Girl; NYX Face Freezie Cooling Primer; Viktor & Rolf Flowerbomb Tiger Lily; Clinique Moisture Surge Active Glow Serum; Mugler Alien Goddess (ugh, why do I get this in every fucking bag?); Paco Rabanne Invictus Victory Elixir; Yves Saint Laurent Black Opium; Good Molecules Hydrating Facial Cleansing Gel; and Dionis Goat Milk Hand Cream in “Vanilla Bean”. I really appreciate that the bag wasn’t one of the 13 items. I could’ve done with less perfume samples, but the rest of the samples are top shelf.

Just $814 until I reach Platinum for 2026.

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Last Ulta Haul of 2024!

I didn’t intentionally wait until the last day of the year to post my last haul of the year…or did I? Seeing as how I placed this order the first week of December…it definitely wasn’t intentional – I was just doing holiday stuff…eating, disassociating, crocheting, losing track of what day it is…THAT’S what the holidays are really about!

This last haul was mostly gifts and stocking stuffers, but since I had a 20% off code, I threw a few things in the bag for myself…like Sol de Janeiro Samba Foot Fetish Cream and Smoothing Board ($27). If you think Bum Bum Cream is good, wait until you try this stuff! It leaves my feet feeling pedicure smooth for DAYS after using it.

Tell me why the r.e.m. beauty Practically Permanent Lip Stain Marker in “booked and busy” that I paid $17 for is like using a felt-tip marker that is running out of ink, but the $11.99 CoverGirl Outlast Lip Stain in “All Star” is like a damn sharpie?

That’s it for personal “gifts”…I admit that I kept the 23 piece beauty bag with $85 purchase for myself…it was a pretty red plaid bag with Garnier Fructis Hair Filler Shampoo & Conditioner packettes; TONYMOLY I’m Aloe Mask Sheet; tarte Shape Tape Corrector Card Sample; Versace Eros; Dime Biome Body Butter; Mugler Alien Goddess; Viktor & Rolf Flowerbomb; Givenchy Gentleman Society; OUAI Fine to Medium Hair Treatment Masque; Valentino Uomo Born in Roma Green Stravaganza (huh?); Yves Saint Laurent Black Opium; Valentino Donna Born in Roma Intense; Good Molecules Hydrating Facial Cleansing Gel; Tom Ford Ombre Leather; Azzaro The Most Wanted; Jean Paul Gaultier Le Male (I think this is what my father-in-law wears?); Givenchy L’Interdit; NYX Lip Pencil in “Ever” (do I sense a hint of “Lolita”?); CHI Infra Silk Infusion; Smashbox Photo Finish Illiminate Glow Primer; Charlotte Tilbury Charlotte’s Magic Serum Crystal Elixir; and Kate Somerville ExfoliKate. So the bag was mostly fragrance from brands I don’t like…but I got a Xmas-y bag to put Barbie sweaters in, so I’m not even mad!

Here’s to a more beautiful 2025!

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Another Wicked Haul

A $10 off $50 code from Ulta means MORE Wicked products!

I have been eyeing the Scünci Wicked Elphaba Wavy Metal Claw Clip ($14) for a bit. That’s a lot for me to pay for a hair clip, but it’s SO FANCY! I also have had my eye on the r.e.m. beauty x Wicked Tulip Field Lip Stain in “Made in Oz” ($18). I am glad I grabbed it when I did, because all three shades are out of stock online.

While looking for the Tulip Field Lip Stain, I came across r.e.m. beauty Practically Permanent Lip Stain Marker in “booked and busy” ($17). I miss the lip stain markers that Ulta used to carry and this one is even better! I might pick up a few more…

OK, I need to learn to look at the sizes of products before I buy them…tell me WHY I paid $10.20 (on sale from $17) for a Biolage Smooth Proof Deep Treatment Pack Multi Use Hair Mask that is only 3.75 ounces? I usually get Shea Moisture or HASK packettes that are 1.75 ounces and less than $2. I was expecting to get more than 3-4 uses out of this damn thing…

OH! The whole reason I started the order was NOT for Wicked goodies…it was because my favorite brow pencil – Ulta Ultra Slim Brow Pencil in “Dark Brown” was on sale for 40% off ($6.60). I added a pack of Exfoliating Cotton Rounds ($2.39, also 40% off) and an EcoTools Exfoliating EcoPouf Loofah ($2.09, just 30% off).

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Pink Pony Ulta Haul

Killing some time before I had to go pick up the kid from Marching Band last week, so I bopped into Ulta to have a look around…

L’Oreal Colorista is not my favorite hair dye, but for $3, I don’t mind have an extra “Metallic Pink” on hand for…dancing at the Pink Pony Club? Or whatever…

I know it’s dumb, but I bought The Body Shop Edelweiss Cleansing Concentrate for Lily…because this year’s Marching Band show opens with “Edelweiss” from The Sound of Music and I thought it would be funny…I spent $6.25 for that eye roll!

I love Wet n Wild’s Fantasy Makers Halloween line, so I grabbed their “Vampire Venom” Lip Gloss Stain ($6.49). It’s got the weirdest applicator. I was expecting a doe foot – but it’s a little plastic spatula? It’s a sheer glossy stain, okay looking I guess.

Finally, I snagged a bottle of L.A. Girl Pro Matte Mixing Pigment in “White” ($9) for my super-secret Halloween makeup that I’ve told everyone about already. Shhhhh…

At least I got to use a $3.50 off $15 coupon!

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Wicked Ulta Haul

As soon as Ulta dropped all of the Wicked Movie Collab products…I knew I was in trouble. I tried – TRIED – to be conservative, but I don’t know if I did a very good job, especially since it was Diamond Love List Monday…

Right off the bat, I knew I had to get the OPI x Wicked Nail Lacquer 12 Piece Mini Pack ($49.99). I hate paying full price for nail polish, but I just couldn’t risk it selling out before I got it. The set has 12 mini polishes, 6 for Elphaba and 6 for Galinda. I am really looking forward to trying them all out. Ariana Grande’s r.e.m. beauty released a bunch of matched sets and lipsticks, but I was drawn to the r.e.m. beauty x Wicked Ozdust Eyeshadow Palette ($55). I am impressed by how creamy and blendable the shadows are. The glitters really pop! I even got a gift with purchase – a full size Midnight Shadows Liquid Eyeshadow. I wasn’t paying attention and thought it was a lipstick – which actually looked amazing after I wiped most of it off and applied lip stain on top of it. It made my lips look like stained glass – new favorite lip look! I’m sure I’ll be picking up more Wicked Collab stuff, but this is it for now.

It’s been a while since I’ve gotten hyped up about Urban Decay, but the new Urban Decay Cosmetics Moondust Space Cowboy Glitter Eyeshadow Palette – Limited Edition ($49) caught my eye. Yes, I know it’s basically just a few shadows pulled from Naked palettes in a fancy package – SHUT UP. I have only gotten to use it once, but I ended up with nice results, so no regrets. Oh, and I also got a Platinum and Diamond Free 5 Piece Gift with $35 makeup purchase, which came with an clear vinyl crossbody bag (perfect for stadiums with a clear bag rule); Urban Decay All Nighter Long Lasting Makeup Setting Spray (ugh, I have so much of this); a card sample of Urban Decay Moondust Eyeshadow in “Space Cowboy”; Urban Decay 24/7 Glide-On Eye Pencil in “Zero”; and Urban Decay Eyeshadow Primer Potion in “Original”.

I added a few more random items to my bag: an EcoTools Exfoliating EcoPouf Loofah ($2.99); L’Oreal True Match Super-Blendable Powder in “C1 Alabaster” ($6.49, on sale from $12.99 – Ulta’s site told me which shade to use based on the shade I wear in Infallible, but it’s a bit light on me); and Thayers Alcohol-Free Witch Hazel Facial Toner in “Rose Petal” ($10.95).

All this got me a Free Platinum & Diamond Exclusive 28 Piece Gift with with $150 purchase – woo hoo! First off, this gift came with a gorgeous chocolate velvet cosmetic bag. Inside the bag: COSRX Master Patch Intensive; Elizabeth Arden Eight Hour HydraPlay Skin Perfecting Daily Moisturizer; Morphe Mini Continuous Setting Mist; Maybelline The Falsies Lash Lift Mascara; Sol de Janeiro Cheirosa 48 Perfume Mist (Awww, I already have one of these); Chloe Intense; Olaplex No. 7 Bonding Oil; Frank Body Glycolic Body Scrub; bareMinerals Complexion Rescue Blonzer (uh whut? It’s blush and bronzer, oh); Estee Lauder Revitalizing Supreme + Night Power Bounce Creme; e.l.f. Power Grip Primer; Benefit The POREfessional Super Setter Long-Lasting Makeup Setting Spray (ugh, more???); Wella Ultimate Repair Miracle Hair Rescue (again, more???); Clarins Total Eye Lift; Polite Society Greatest Lashes of All Time Mascara (braggy a bit?); Dime TBT Cream (what even is this?); Eau Thermale Avene Cicalfate Intensive Skin Restorative Serum; megababe Le Tush Clarifying Butt Mask (literally laughed out loud); tarte tartelette XL tubing Mascara; Charlotte Tilbury Exagger-eyes Mascara; Florence by Mills Floating Under the Eyes Patches; CeraVe Acne Foaming Cream Cleanser; OUAI Leave in Conditioner; Buxom Plump Shot Collagen Infused Lip Serum; e.l.f. Skin Holy Hydration Eye Cream; pixi Glow Tonic; NOYZ Lost + Found; and Vichy Mineral 89 Fortifying and Plumping Daily Booster. Damn, my fingers are TIRED.

I should feel worse about randomly spending $150+ without a good coupon or sale…but I don’t, because I used the last $30 of Ulta points I had saved up.

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Diamond in 2025 Ulta Haul

I’d been dropping stuff in my cart for a few weeks and finally checked out…

I am paranoid about running out of shampoo & conditioner, so I got back-ups of Sol de Janeiro Brazilian Joia Strengthening + Smoothing Shampoo and Conditioner ($26 each).

I saw that Ulta had a gift with purchase for buying $19.50 worth of Ulta products…I can do that in my sleep! I had been eyeballing the Ulta Beauty Collection Weightless Water Lip Stain in “Cherry Pie” ($11). I was expecting it to be redder on…I guess I need to put like, 35 coats on? My nails need attention, so I also got an Ulta Manicure Buffing Block ($4) and two packs of Exfoliating Cotton Rounds ($3.99). I got the pink variant of the gift with purchase, which includes a 6 pan eye shadow palette; Ultamate Lashes Multi-Tasking Mascara; Poreless Face Primer; Cream Blush Stick; Tinted Eye Primer; High Shine Liquid Lipstick; Tinted Lip Oil; an Eye Shadow Brush; and a Makeup Sponge.

Speaking of nails, I also stocked up on Zoya Remove+ Nail Polish Remover ($8.40, down from $12) and a Flowery Blue Max 4-Way Buffing Block ($2.09, down from $2.99). Since I like color changing lip products and Tim Burton, I got a few of the Nightmare Before Christmas Collection products – Wet n Wild Nightmare Before Christmas Truth or Scare Color Changing Lip Oil and Nightmare Before Christmas Two-Faced Color Changing Lip Oil ($5.99 each). They are not sticky and have surprisingly solid staying power.

I used a $3.50 off $15 coupon AND $50 of my collected Ulta points, but that didn’t stop me from qualifying for 2 more gifts with purchase. First, I qualified for a 14 Piece Fall Haul with my $70 purchase, which included Belif Moisturizing Eye Bomb, Clean it Zero Ginseng-Glow Cleansing Balm; e.l.f. Poreless Putty Primer; NYX Duck Plump High Pigment Plumping Gloss in “Clearly Spicy” (I just put this on and it reminds me of the original Lip Venom – pure capsaicin on my lips – Jesus FUCK); Snail Rescue Purifying Cleanser; La Roche-Posay Mela Serum Dark Spot Correction; Florence by Mills Wildly Me (do you understand what I mean when I say it smells purple? The notes are iris, wisteria, violet and lavender); CeraVe Moisturizing Lotion; First Aid Beauty KP Bump Eraser Body Scrub (the sole reason I picked this bag variation); The Good Patch Dream Patch (a melatonin patch!); Tula The Cult Cleanser (oh, a DELUXE sample!); eczema honey Soothing Body Wash; Cetaphil Gentle Skin Cleanser; and Vichy Mineral 89 Fortifying and Plumping Daily Booster (what is it even boosting?) I also qualified for a Platinum & Diamond Exclusive Free 10 Piece Gift with $90 purchase, which included Laura Mercier Tinted Moisturizer Bronzer (I bet this makes me look like I’m wearing blackface); Yves Saint Laurent Libre (stinky); Wella Ultimate Repair Miracle Hair Rescue (giving to Lily to deal with all day marching band braid damage); Benefit Precisely, My Brow Pencil in “Warm Deep Brown” (oh, this might be a match – I usually end up with Taupe in sample packs); tarte Maracuja Juicy Plumping Lip Oil (ugh, not falling for this again); Living Proof. Perfect hair Day High-Shine Gloss; Kylie Jenner Matte Liquid Lipstick in “Kylie” (ugh); Smashbox Photo Finish Primer; Anastasia Beverly Hills Lash Sculpt Lengthening & Volumizing Mascara; and OUAI Detox Shampoo (but NO MATCHING CONDITIONER – rude). Lots of good stuff!

This purchase pushed me over the edge! I’m Diamond in 2025!

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Well, Fuck You TOO Fed Ex

I was shocked that my poor Ulta order made it through this abuse from Fed Ex…UPS would NEVER.

Really, the main product I was worried about was the L’Oreal Infallible 24H Fresh Wear Foundation In A Powder in “20 Ivory” ($12.74 – 25% off), but I spy no cracks. I would’ve been SO MAD!

I also decided to try Derma E Psorzema Scalp Relief Shampoo and Conditioner ($9.75 each – 25% off) to tackle the heartbreak of psoriasis. It has tee tree oil and tingles. [My late mother LOVED tingly shampoo, especially Nioxin – I feel like she would’ve LIVED for this product.]

I’d been fairly indifferent to the endless Disney Collection from Nailtopia, but I literally screamed when I saw Nailtopia’s Spongebob Squarepants 25th Anniversary collection – and on sale for 30% off. I controlled myself and only picked up “Squidward” and “Golden Pineapple”. Oh, and throw in a new Eco Tools Exfoliating EcoPouf Loofah ($2.99) and Thayers pH Balancing Daily Cleanser with Aloe Vera ($14.99) for good measure.

I lucked into three different gifts with purchase! The Free 11 Piece Back To School sampler with $50 purchase came with Matrix Food for Soft Shampoo & Conditioner (deluxe bottles!); Redken One United Multi-Benefit Treatment; Lancome Lipstick (some random pink color); another Thayers pH Balancing Daily Cleanser with Aloe Vera (going in my travel bag NOW); it Cosmetics Superhero Elastic Stretch Mascara in “Super Black”; NYX Vivid Rich Mechanical Eyeliner in “Always Onyx”; L’Oreal Revitalift Derm Intensives Plumping Serum (hello, travel bag); Maybelline The Falsies Surreal Mascara; La Roche-Posay Anthelios Light Fluid Sunscreen SPF 50; and CeraVe Hydrating Foaming Oil Cleanser. That’s a DAMN GOOD freebie bag! I also got a Kiehl’s Free Set For School Gift #3 with $50 purchase that came with Kiehl’s Truly Targeted Acne-Clearing Solution; Kiehl’s Ultra Facial Cleanser; and Kiehl’s Super Multi-Corrective Soft Cream. Last, but not least, there was the Free 13 Piece Mystery Sampler with $60 Ulta Beauty Rewards Credit Card purchase that came with OUAI Leave In Conditioner; Sunday Riley C.E.O. Glow Vitamin C + Turmeric Face Oil; Clean It Zero Original Cleansing Balm; Smashbox The Original Photo Finish Primer (ugh, I just got rid of like…10 of these); Good Molecules Lightweight Daily Moisturizer (travel bag); Grande Cosmetics GrandeLASH-MD Lash Enhancing Serum; Peach & Lily Glass Skin Refining Serum (travel bag – LOVE this stuff); it Cosmetics Confidence in an Eye Cream; La Roche-Posay Toleriane Hydrating Gentle Cleanser (travel bag); Vichy Liftactiv Supreme H.A. Serum; Lancome Cils Booster XL Mascara Base; L’Occitane Dry Skin Hand Cream; and e.l.f. Power Grip Primer. I’ve got a lot of trips coming up and I’m set on samples for my travel bag!

I got my hairs did yesterday and my son and his girlfriend have been using my Ulta account, so only $164 to Diamond in 2025.

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A Bigger Bum Bum Ulta Haul

Ulta coupon codes that include prestige brands are getting rarer and rarer…the ones that came with June’s Diamond Love List was only 15% – what happened to the 20% off coupons???

I jumped on the chance to get more BUM BUM…the 33oz refill of Sol de Janeiro Brazilian Play Body Wash was $49, versus $56 for the same amount in a bottle. I hope they start offering refills of the Brazilian Joia Strengthening + Smoothing Shampoo and Brazilian Joia Strengthening + Smoothing Conditioner ($26 each).

I have a hate/hate relationship with my leg hair, so I am trying out Tree Hut Ocean Glow Moisturizing Shave Oil ($12.99), upon Lala’s recommendation. I haven’t had a chance to try it yet…I gave the poor lady who did my last pedi an extra tip, don’t worry. I also got a Tree Hut freebie – Tropic Glow Mini Sparkling Gel Wash. I added Ulta Beauty Exfoliating Round Cotton Pads ($3.49) for funsies.

$579 to Diamond in 2025.