Long Kiss


Miss me? Been a bit busy, as all of Southeast Texas is now beachfront property. We’re all safe and dry (now) and I can get back my nails.

China Glaze “Long Kiss” is a luscious, shimmery wine. Not bad for 97 cents! I probably have a dozen or so maroon/wine/blood polishes, but I forget them all when I see a new one. I started with Sinful Colors Base Coat and then two clean coats of “Long Kiss”. I could’ve gone with one…but I never go with just one. The consistency is perfect – smooth and even. I got a few bubbles, but they disappeared under “HK Girl”.

I did these Saturday night and they lasted well up until today, with just a few chips on my right thumb. I did my toes, too and they’re still going strong.



Ulta gives out unique coupon codes for their spring 20% off, so I didn’t have a cute name for this post…Instead of one or two big things, I bought a lot of little stuff. I also bought some gifts for another upcoming birthday, so those items are not shown, of course.

I can’t pass up 97 cent polishes, so the first thing I added to my cart were essie “Strut Your Stuff” and China Glaze “Long Kiss”. I then added two Freeman Beauty Masks – “Sweet Tea & Lemon Peel-Away Clay Mask” and “Apple Cider Vinegar 4-in-1 Foaming Clay”. I wanted to try another shade of Makeup Revolution Lip Euphoria, so I got “Aura”. I added another Zoya Remove+ for shits and giggles.

There were so many gifts with purchase last week! I got free Redken pack with Beach Envy Volume Texturizing Shampoo & Conditioner, Beach Envy Wave Aid and 25 Benefits One United Multi-Benefit Treatment (I have a full size of this that I use all the time). I also got a free Ahava pack with Dead Sea Crystal Osmoter Facial Serum (the fuck?), Time to Clear Purifying Mud Mask, Time to Hydrate Essential Day Moisturizer, Dead Sea Water Mineral Body Lotion, and a free tote bag. By far, the best samples were in the free Smashbox bag, which came with all this: Ahava Beauty Before Age Uplift Day and Uplift Night Cream, Parissa Brow Shaper Mini Wax Strips (I don’t have eyebrows, but I have a mustache – wonder if it will work?), pür Correcting Primer, Hampton Sun Sunless Tanning Gel (NO), Estee Lauder Modern Muse Le Rouge (me likey), Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue (me no likey), MyChelle Dermaceuticals Refining Sugar Cleanser, Smashbox Photo Finish Foundation Primer (for real), StriVectin Advanced Retinol Intensive Night Moisturizer, It’s a 10 Miracle Leave-In Product, LORAC POREfection Mattifying Face Primer and Benefit Benetint.

Oh ya, also samples of Benefit Dew the Hoola Bronzer and Urban Decay Naked Skin Ultra Definition Powder Foundation.

Phew…my fingers are TIRED.

The Brown Mound


If you’ve known me a long, long time – you might remember the car I had in high school and college – a dookie colored 1978 Chevy Nova, covered in the requisite 90s grunge/fight the power/darwin fish bumper stickers. My dookie brown ride earned the nickname “The Brown Mound” from my friend, Chris. (But, um, at least I had a car…why did I always have to go pick your ass up?) In any case, China Glaze “Soft Sienna Silks” reminds me of the soft dookie brown of my old faithful Nova.

I received “Soft Sienna Silks” in this month’s ipsy bag. I love receiving polishes in my subscriptions – I wish I received more. I started with Orly Bonder, and then two thin coats of dookie brown goodness. This was a very slow drying polish – I managed to smudge several fingers before I could get the “HK Girl” on. Luckily, it is also very forgiving – I was able to smooth down the smudges on my thumb and pinky – they’re barely noticeable in the pic.

This is a perfect autumn polish – now if we would just get some perfect autumn weather…

November Ipsy Bag – Beauty Blast


Well, November’s Ipsy bag is BADASS! I love the galaxy print on the bag and the products are top notch. I’m pretty sure Ipsy wins November…

Inside my “Beauty Blast” glam bag: China Glaze Nail Lacquer in “Soft Sienna Silks” (this color is going on my nails TOMORROW); Beaute Basics Sahara Gold Chubby Eye Pencil; LeeAni Eco Go Away Gloomy Day Serum; Smashbox Cosmetics Full Exposure Mascara (NICE); and tre’StiQue Mini Matte Lip Crayon in “Chile Red”.

If you’d like to try Ipsy – click here. I’ll earn 250 points if you sign up through my link.

Halloween Whopper


So…I broke down and ate one of those Halloween Whoppers from Burger King – you know, the one with the black bun? Turns out, the black bun turns your poop green. Not the muted green after a tasty blue snow cone, or the dark green after a spinach salad – but GREEN – bright green. Of course, Buzzfeed is all over it.

Instead of sending poo pictures to my friends and relatives, I figured that the easiest way to communicate the effect of the Halloween Whopper is through my fingernails. Here is is folks, THIS is the color I was stuck with for two whole DAYS. It’s China Glaze “Four Leaf Clover” and it is MAGNIFICENT. Bask in the glory of my poo color.

I’ve had this polish since before I even started this site. Lily picked it out for me for Christmas one year. It’s almost as if she KNEW. This is two coats over Sinful Colors Base Coat with “HK Girl”. I got a bit of crusties – I need to be more careful. (I mean on my nails, not on my butt.)

Sexist Nail Polish


Why can’t this polish be called “Be a Millionaire”? Nope, it’s China Glaze “Marry a Millionaire”, from this month’s ipsy bag.

At least half the nail polish on the planet have ridiculous names that have no relationship to the actual color. But it’s the sexist ones that irritate me for some reason. No, not the sexist ones…it’s the golddiggery ones. (Both China Glaze AND Essie have a polish called “Trophy Wife”, if that tells you anything.)

End rant…besides the stupid name, “Marry a Millionaire” is amazing. It’s got fine purple and silver glitter, with green bar glitter – it’s a different color, depending on the angle of light. I got full coverage in just 2 coats, even though it has a clear base.

Even with Sinful Colors Base Coat and “HK Girl” for the top coat, it chipped horribly quickly. I think it was my fault though – the bar glitter hung off the edges, and I get rubbing it and picking at it to make it smooth. I had to take it off already. On the bright side, it actually came off really easily – no chainsaw needed.

February Ipsy Bag – #ipsyLove


My ipsy bag is getting better and better.

“#ipsyLove” is February’s theme. I am most excited about the polish in this bag – China Glaze “Marry a Millionaire”. The picture doesn’t do it justice – lavender and silver glitter, with green bar glitter. I also got JOYA Compostion No. 1 Parfum Oil, Medusa’s Makeup Safari Eye Shadow in “Headhunter”, Mitchell and Peach Fine Radiance Face Oil (I just started using face oil this week to try to combat winter dryness – I’ve been using nyakio Hydrating Face Oil with Kola Nut, but that sample is almost gone) and ModelCo BLUSH Cheek Powder in “Peach Bellini”.

I also used my ipsy points to get Figs & Rouge Nourishing & Soothing Hand Cream in “Rose Berry”. It is in the same tube as their lip gloss, so I hope I don’t get the two confused…

The bag is super cute and matches my purse – I’m already using my bag from last month for makeup, so I wonder what else I can put in a makeup bag in my purse?

If you’d like to try Ipsy – click here. I’ll earn 250 points if you sign up through my link.

FABulous DRAGon


I was not too in love with my Gumby nails. Since I didn’t get to put a shiny top coat on, it was bugging the crap out of me.

Glitter fixes everything, right?

I tried a single coat of essie Luxeffects “A Cut Above” to jazz it up. The glitter looks like badass reptilian scales. Now I look like a FABulous DRAGon – like a real life version of a Drag Queen Dragon! Or that sexy lady dragon on Shrek?



At first I thought of green Play-Doh, but then I was like…no – Gumby!

Lily also wanted her nails done and she demanded that we match. I tried to talk her into Sinful Colors “Vintage”, but refused. She chose Funky Fingers “Oogie Boogie”, Sinful Colors “Pine Away” & “Mystery Moonshine” and China Glaze “Four Leaf Clover”. I couldn’t handle all of those together…but I picked something close.

I tried out the Sinful Colors Basecoat – it was fine. It went on smoothly and dried quickly, no complaints. I put on 2 coats of “Four Leaf Clover” and then topped with Sinful Colors “Green Ocean”.

I tried out the Sinful Colors Quick Dry…and I totally misunderstood the product I was buying. I thought it was a quick dry top coat, but it is a quick dry oil – like Julep Ta-Da! Well fuck. I already have 2 bottles of Ta-Da! and I don’t really use them. The combination REALLY needed a shiny topcoat – the flakies in “Green Ocean” sank into the polish and made the finish all cloudy. Since I had already started with the Quick Dry, I couldn’t put another top coat over it. Live and learn…

Jamberry Chip Challenge


Although I excel at painting my nails, I’m not so confident when it comes to nail art. I have an art degree, yet I shy away from anything more detailed than globbing glitter on the ends of my fingernails. Jamberry Nail Wraps might be an interesting solution to that problem.

Nail Wraps have been around for quite awhile – they’re just stickers for your nails. I’ve gotten other brands, like Sally Hansen, as gifts, but I’ve never actually tried them. When my cousin, Kimberly, offered me a sample to try, I figured – why not?

The top pictures is my day one picture – a leopard Jamberry Nail Wrap on my pinky and 2 coats of China Glaze “Bat My Eyes” (with Revlon base and top coats). Notice that I had already chipped my index finger while trying to peal the plastic safety seal off of a new bottle of contact solution!


The bottom picture is my day three picture. Most of my painted nails look pretty good, but that index finger is looking pretty rough. The Jamberry finger looks exactly the same!

The sample I got was a little small for my nails – it was too small for my pinky even. I never considered myself to have large fingernails…but I AM 6’1, so maybe I do. A full pack comes with various sizes, so I don’t think that would be a problem for me.

It was easier than I expected to apply the wraps. I didn’t need any special heat lamps or tools – I was able to heat it with a hair dryer and and just press it on with my finger. I was able to get a fairly smooth edge using a regular emery board.

For what you’re getting, they aren’t overly expensive. $15 a sheet and you should be able to get 4 manicures per sheet. As much as I love to paint my nails, I cannot imagine committing to a single design for 2 weeks! I don’t foresee myself switching to wraps or even using them on a regular basis…but I can envision myself using them occasionally on an accent nail.

If you would like to find out more about Jamberry, visit Kimberly’s site – http://kimberlymoreno.jamberrynails.net/ .