February 2018 Ipsy Bag – Unzipped

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Ipsy takes on a monumental task with February’s theme, “Unzipped”, the insert card boldly declaring, “Being sexy isn’t limited to a certain size, shape, or age.” Not only YES, but FUCK YASSS! Thank you, Ipsy!

I’m a big fan of black lace on nude – I have several skirts and dresses, not to mention lingerie, that would be a swell match for this bag.

The products are a bit “meh” this month, but not horrible. I’m actually glad to have a bit of dry shampoo – I’d given all mine away around Xmas-time. It’s Eva NYC Freshen Up Dry Shampoo. Also in this month’s bag: -417 Hand Moisturizer (a neutral scent, I cannot quite place it); TRÈSTIQUE Mini Eye Pencil in “Swiss Chocolate”; Beaute Basics Eyeshadow in “Lavish”; and a Luxie Beauty Blending and Shading Eye Brush 249 (I think this is going into my travel makeup brush set).

If you’d like to try Ipsy – click here. I’ll earn 250 points if you sign up through my link.

RuPaul’s Fortress of Solitude

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I’ve found it – the most beautiful nightlight in the universe. If RuPaul was a superhero, this would be his Fortress of Solitude. The pink quartz crystals are a beautiful contrast to my soft turquoise walls.

I’ll admit, my online shopping is picking up a little bit since I’ve been housebound. I am not even embarrassed. If I end up on Hoarders, so be it – at least I have a good backstory.

I kept breaking the cheapass nightlight in the living room. It’s right before the alcove to my bedroom and I NEED a nightlight there…so why not blow $16.50 on a Wallflowers Nightlight from Bath & Body Works? Refill bulbs were 5/$18 or 7/$24, so I went ahead and ordered 7. I even paid $5.95 for shipping, but only because I had a $10 off $30. I just cannot imagine dealing with Katy Mills Mall right now, so I’ll pay for shipping.

Imagine my rage, as I was going through a pile of mail and coupons, I found a Bath & Body Works Coupon Flyer offering me a FREE Wallflower plug. It wasn’t even expired. SONOFABITCH.

To VD or Not VD…

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Who am I kidding? We ALWAYS VD.

I had planned on using my fancy gold rose nail decals for a VD mani, but Lily really wanted to design matching nails for us, so I decided to have some fun with her. I did decline to let her paint my nails – sorry, hun.

I was shocked that she started with Sinful Colors Base Coat. I think I am finally rubbing off on her! She selected Sinful Colors “Sugar Sugar” and “Surreally Sweet” as alternating base colors. She assured me that I had to go with one coat of “Sugar Sugar” and two coats of “Surreally Sweet”. (I knew she was wrong about “Sugar Sugar”, but I let it go. As soon as I started with the top coats, I got bald spots – easy to fix though.) She showed me how to do an ombre of the two colors on my middle nail – it worked fantastically!

She picked Sinful Colors “I’m All In”, “Kissful Thinking” and Funky Fingers “Queen of Hearts” as toppers. “Kissful Thinking” is on our middle fingers, with “I’m All In” on our thumbs and ring fingers and “Queen of Hearts” on our index fingers and pinkies.

The finishing touch was Glisten & Glow Top Coat. Oh, did I mention that we were watching The Monkees the whole time we painted? I got her hooked!

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Nails aside, the REAL holiday at our house is February 15th. You know why.

We didn’t buy our kids a goddamn thing for VD. But immediately after school on the 15th, we loaded them into the truck and hit Walgreen’s. $10 each goes a long way when all the candy is 50% off!

I ended up spending more like $20 on myself, but I got the best stuff – Lindt Truffles, Russell Stover (the Elegant Collection, not the regular ones) and Godiva. This is just spoiling myself really, since my husband already brought me Bailey’s Strawberries & Cream and a bunch of European Chocolate from work. (Unfortunately, the special Loot Crate I ordered him in November hasn’t made it yet….boo.)

I was also treated to 3/$5 Sinful Colors! This store had a pitiful selection, but I did find 3 new colors – “Rorange” (red + orange?), “You Just Wait”, and “Sucker Punch”. I looked for a Sinful Colors Base Coat, but they didn’t have any…so weird.

I had amassed a $5 credit, too. I don’t even know how I did that. Who knows, but I LOVE Walgreen’s!

BBQ Sauce

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Maybe because I’ve lived in Texas so long, but when I look at my nails – all I see is BBQ sauce. Spicy, sparkly, BBQ sauce.

Or maybe I’m just hungry for ribs. Right now, my favorite is the Whataburger Honey BBQ, but my husband just picked up The Jank and it’s a contender.

This is Julep “Pia”, from this month’s Maven box. Julep says it’s a spiced burgundy iridescent shimmer, but I see more of a mahogany.

I started with Julep Oxygen Bonding Base Coat and then two coats of “Pia”. I admit, it was late when I painted them and my coats were heavy around the edges of my nails. Unfortunately, this led to even heavier edges with Glisten & Glow Top Coat. It was difficult to get clean edges and my nails resemble well-done ribs, with those crispy delicious edges…

Gloomy Lotion

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As cynical as I am, I’m a sucker for a new products. I’ve been wanting to get my hands on L’Oreal’s True Match Lumi Glotion Natural Glow Enhancer in “Fair” ($14.99). (In my head, I always think Gloomy Lotion). I’ve been really liking the GlamGlow Illuminating Moisturizer. The Gloomy Lotion doesn’t smell as good, but it does the job – I like it.

Since I had a 20% off coupon, I filled my cart with a few other things to get to $50. I also wanted to try Maybelline’s Total Temptation Eyebrow Definer Pencil in “Medium Brown” ($7.99). I’ve been loving on the Ulta Slim, but this one is a winner, too! It’t only about 2/3 the length, so it might not be such a good deal pricewise. I got a $5 off a future purchase from those brands for my purchase.

I also got refills of my SheaMoisture Peace Rose Oil Complex Shampoo and Conditioner ($11.49). It wasn’t on sale, but hey, 20% off. Speaking of rose, I also had to try out Philosophy‘s new scent – Amazing Grace Nude Rose ($20). It’s similar with Ballet Rose, but instead of notes of leather, there are green notes. It made my husband gag, so that’s a really good sign.

Oh, and thanks for actually sending me samples, Ulta! I got a cared with three different shades of Too Faced Born This Way Foundation and a card with samples of L’Oreal Revitalift Serum and Moisturizer.

Only $397.23 to get to Platinum for 2019. Chances of hitting Diamond status? At this juncture, I’d say highly unlikely.

Go Eagles! (AKA Fuck Tom Brady)

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Anyone who knows me knows that I don’t give a shit about the sportsball. The only interesting thing about the Super Bowl are the commercials…and that I can get away with eating an entire brick’s worth of queso by myself. I usually don’t even bother picking a team to root for…unless I can root against Tom Brady. This past week has been torture, with every media outlet continuously sucking his dick. Notwithstanding his despicable personal life, he’s a fucking cheater. What the fuck, America?

ANYWAY, stepping down off my soapbox to talk about my Philadelphia Eagles nails. Google told me that their team colors are midnight teal, silver and black. Hmmmm…of course I can make that happen.

I use Sinful Colors “Calypso” as my midnight teal. After Sinful Colors Base Coat, I did two coats of “Calypso” on my thumb, middle and pinky. I used Sinful Colors “Queen of Beauty” for the silver – two coats on my index finger. I tried a coat of Sinful Colors “Teal Midnight” on my ring finger, but it was much too sheer. I did a coat of Sinful Colors “JadeKat” and it was much better. I then went old school and busted out the crackle top coat – Sally Hansen “Star Burst”. I used a thin coat over my index and ring fingers and it crackled right up. For a finishing touch, I used a dotting tool to paint dots with “Queen of Beauty” on my middle finger and Sinful Colors “Black on Black” on my pinky. After topping then all with Glisten & Glow Top Coat, they all looked marvelous.

My only annoyance is that “Calypso” photographs so darkly – it looks black!

Go Eagles! Make Brady eat balls!

Give Me Some Nude Lip – Take 4

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I am such a sucker for Sephora’s curated lip sets. I don’t know if it is the lipstick or the little lip shaped box that they come in. I’d say it was the box, but I REALLY wanted one of those lippies. So I got the new Sephora Favorites Give Me Some Nude Lip Set ($28).

The one I really wanted? NARS Lipstick in “Orgasm”. I had gotten a deluxe sample of NARS Orgasm Blush a while back and it is one of my favorites – all the hype is true – it is universally flattering. I actually put on makeup for the first time in weeks yesterday, just so I could see the blush and lipstick together – heavenly.

Also in the the glittery white lip box: Hourglass Girl Lip Stylo in “Futurist”; Buxom Full-On Lip Polish in “Sugar” (really just a sheer gloss); Tarte Tarteist Quick Dry Matte Lip Paint in “Exposed” (I love a basic brown matte); Urban Decay Cosmetics Vice Special Effects in “Fever” (I’d be more impressed if these weren’t on clearance for $9 everywhere); and Smashbox Cosmetics Be Legendary Lip Pigment in “Mauve Wife” (this will be my fave – it’s like a cross between Lolita and Androgyny!)

Oh, and no dupes! I didn’t have any of these lippies!

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I also used this order to get my Sephora Birthday gift – I chose the GlamGlow set with GlamGlow SuperMud Clearing Treatment and GlowStarter Mega Illuminating Moisturizer. My other chose was some Bite Beauty Lipstick – meh.

Can we talk about samples? Even though I got the 2 deluxe samples I used a special code for – it Cosmetics Confidence in a Cleanser (divine) and Miu Miu L’eau Rosee (not a straight rose, but like running through an unkempt rose garden with roses and whatever happens to be growing there) – I DID NOT get my other samples. This is the third time in a row!

First I emailed Customer Service again, they quickly apologized qand gave me 225 points. That’s nice and all, but not a solution. I took to twitter and then DMed with Sephora. They admitted it’s been an ongoing issue, blah blah blah. I can tell you what the issue is – the samples are no longer showing up on the pick list that shows up in my box. I’ve been using the app to order, so next order will be placed online and we’ll see if that helps..

$932 to Rouge…but $282 to VIB Insider is more likely.

February 2018 Julep Maven Box – Eyes For You

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Even thought it was just days before my surgery, I got in there and chose my polishes for February.

The new beauty product for February was an eye cream, but I don’t really fuck with eye creams, so I went for all polishes instead. I chose It Girl “Norah”oxide red shimmer (I thought it was “Laurie” when I saw it in the box – it seems very similar); Wonder Maven “Pia”spiced burgundy iridescent shimmer (whoa dude); and Boho Glam “Emmy”olive ghost shimmer (it looks like rose leaves to me). I also got TWO sheets of gold rose decals – TWO! I’m really looking forward to trying all these polishes.

The candy is also back – I got a single milk chocolate heart.

Not a Julep Maven? Click HERE to join – I’ll get a $15 credit and you’ll get your first box free!

Geri

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Julep “Geri” is absolutely depressing. I didn’t even know that nail polish could be depressing…but yeah, it sure as fuck can. It’s not ugly depressing, it’s quite beautiful…but it feel like I’m getting ready for a funeral, or even worse – a job interview.

“Geri” is one of the Wonder Maven polishes, named for an inspiring woman…but I couldn’t find anything on Julep’s Blog about a “Geri.” Weird.

“Geri” was thicker than I like in a creme polish – this is two coats over Julep Oxygen Bonding Base Coat and under Glisten Glow Base Coat. I’m gonna try it with glitter next time. Glitter is never depressing.

 

Sephora Play January 2018 – Happy You Year!

 

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It’s January 31st, I had major surgery and I am still managing to cover all my January boxes in January. High Five!

This month’s “Happy You Year” bag is filled with products to revitalize. The first thing I squealed over is the GlamGlow SuperCleanse Clearing Cream-to-Foam Cleanser – I LOVE GlamGlow!

Also in this month’s bag: Briogeo Don’t Despair, Repair Deep Conditioning Mask (just a foil pack, boo); Lancome Cils Booster Super-Enhancing Mascara Booster (don’t care); Smashbox Photo FInish Primerizer  (primer AND moisturizer – genius!); Ole Henriksen Hygge HydraClay Detox Mask (I love me some masks); and Clinique Pep-Start Eye Cream.

No fragrance though – boo!

If you don’t get Sephora Play, sign up TODAY. Sephora Play is only $10/month. You can sign up at sephora.com/play.