Month: July 2014


Everybody Be Cool!


If you knew me 20 years ago, chance are…you knew me like this.

True, this pic was from Halloween, but even when it wasn’t Halloween…I dressed like this a lot. (Thanks Bryan McAlister – for loaning me your shirt that I never gave back – I wore it until there were holes in it…)

What can I say? I was obsessed. I saw Pulp Fiction like 6 or 7 times in the theater. While I’m wearing a wig in the picture, I actually (accidentally) dyed my hair black the next Spring and then cut it in a pageboy (in my bathroom while drinking). I thought I WAS Mrs. Mia Wallace….until of course, I decided I was Amy Blue. (What are the odds on a Doom Generation palette coming out?)


Cut to 20 years later…thanks Urban Decay, for releasing the Pulp Fiction Collection when I can actually afford it. Thanks to Ulta, too – for releasing the collection the same week as a 20% off EVERYTHING coupon.

I bought it ALL. The “Pulp Fiction” Palette comes with 5 eye shadows: Righteous (light cream matte), Tyranny (warm brown matte), Vengeance (deep taupe-brown matte-satin), Furious (white satin) and Anger (black satin w/slight tonal sparkle); Revolution Lipstick in “Mrs. Mia Wallace”a deep, blood red; Nail Enamel in “Mrs. Mia Wallace” – Deep red w/slight shimmer; Heavy Metal Glitter Liner in “Gunmetal” – Black w/black and silver sparkle – and 24/7 Glide-On Lip Pencil in “Mrs. Mia Wallace”a deep, blood red.

I also picked up a new UBU Powder Brush – my old Mary Kay one was scratching up my face.

With my coupon and Ulta points, I managed to spend just under $100. I never could have afforded that 20 years ago!


Watermelon Improvisation


I don’t know how to describe Sparitual “Improvisation”. It’s pinkish, reddish, shimmer? The shimmer shifts from fuchsia to blue in the light, while the base shifts from red to pink. Sparitual’s website describes it as berry shimmer. Thanks…so NOT helpful.

I’ve decided that “Improvisation” is a juicy slice of ripe watermelon. The shimmer is the water oozing out of the slice.

This is a super sheer polish. After Revlon Quick Dry Base Coat, I had to use 3-4 coats to get decent coverage. Even after those 3-4 coats, I have VNL – VISIBLE NAIL LINE. No ma’am!

This isn’t a matte polish, but it isn’t super shiny either. Revlon Quick Dry Top Coat fixed that in 3 shakes of a lamb’s tail. (Can you tell I’m dreaming of the new Urban Decay Pulp Fiction Collection?)



Bar Magical Pixie Dust


OF COURSE, I’m going to start with the Magical Pixie Dust!

This is Zoya “Bar” Magical Pixie Dust – a glittery nude topaz. I want to try an Ombre with “Bar and “Godiva” next…

2 Coats, no base or top coats, just like Zoya says to do. It was quite pokey and sharp right after application and I left a trail of glitter on whatever I touched…that’s FUCKING AWESOME! I felt like a goddamn unicorn.


Zoya Threedom


I tried to time it so that my mailbox didn’t fill up while I was gone on vacation. In addition to the Ballasox I ordered from Amazon (I want Tieks, but I don’t want to pay for them), my Zoya Threedom order was waiting for me! Finally!

Over 4th of July Weekend, Zoya was offering any 3 polishes for FREE, with $12 shipping. An odd promotion, but a smoking deal. I picked 2 Pixie Dusts and a Magical Pixie Dust – $30 value.

I chose “Godiva” – a soft nude with a sugared sparkle, “Chyna” – a red dazzle with a sugared sparkle and “Bar”a glittery nude topaz. I know – what’s with all the nudes? I couldn’t help it, they look like sugary deliciousness…


Vacay Shopping


Did you miss me?

Or did you just miss my nails?

No one will be surprised that I managed to find new nail polish while vacationing in the sleepy little fishing town of Ketchikan, Alaska. The economy of Ketchikan is built on fishing and cruise ships – the town is comprised of 90% gift shops, 9% bars and 1% everything else. In addition to the many T-shirts, stuffed animals, totem poles and various sundry tourist knick knacks, I found Caribongo Sun Activated fingernail polish. I got blue glitter – “City Girl” – and silver glitter – “Puttin’ on the Glitz”. As far as I can tell, both turn red in the sun.


…and then my sister took me to her favorite store…Simply Bella. Simply Bella is a boutique that has everything – beauty items, cookware and entertaining, gifts, home fragrance, chocolate, jewelry – just anything you could ever want.

I picked up “Royal Peony Rose & Mandarin Musk” Perfume Oil by Lucy B Cosmetics. I had never heard of Lucy B. – but this perfume oil is the real deal. Here’s a blurb from their websiteLucy B. is the only fragrance and colour range in the world to have infused the natural Australian Flower Essences within their products, offering you a taste of the Australian energy & lifestyle.


…so we went back to Simply Bella a few days later and I stumbled across a 75% Clearance Rack.

I showed some restraint and picked up Coco Rose Tinted Lip Balm in “Blush Pink” by Figs & Rouge. Figs & Rouge is a 100% natural lipcare brand from the UK. Can you see the FLAMINGOS on the balm????

I also grabbed a Butter London Lippy in “Pip Pip”.

I was also introduced to John Kelly Chocolates. Jesus, that shit is GOOD.


One last pic…somehow, I managed to NOT paint my nails during my whole vacation. 10 whole days. For real.

I’m still not sick of Zoya “Sooki”.

This is the nasty tear I suffered at the claws of a Dungeness Crab. I fought the crab and the crab won.

I did have the last laugh…he ended up in my tummy!


Tramp Red


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When I described my obsession with Zoya “Sooki” to my friend Rachel, she immediately asked, “Is it TRAMP RED?” She knows me…and Sookie Stackhouse…so well!

I had a hard time picking out polish for my vacation. Since I already had “Sooki” on my toes, I figured I could paint my nails to match. Since I may not have time to paint my nails while on vacation, I did everything I could to make it last as long as possible. Although I usually only use one coat of “Sooki” on my toes, I used 2 on my fingernails to try to avoid edge wear. Those two coats were sandwiched in between Revlon Quick Dry Base Coat and Top Coat.

I’ll miss you…see you in a week or so!


July Ipsy Bag – Sensationally Sunkissed


Ipsy came last this month…So slow!

“Sensationally Sunkissed” is July’s theme. I am NOT a sun worshiper, so this month’s bag isn’t quite as exciting for me as previous months. This month’s bag is bright ass hot pink vinyl with scalloped edges – very cute.

Inside this month’s bag: Elizabeth Mott Tints & Sass in “Cherry” (another lip and cheek stain); bareMinerals 5-in-1 BB Advanced Performance Cream Eyeshadow Broad Spectrum SPF 15 (SPF in eye shadow…odd); POP Beauty Sunkissed Bronzer in “Secret Sunshine” (maybe I can use it as blush); Faith Aromatherapy “Citrus-Ginger” Anti-Oxidant Body Lotion (smells so good); and Pur~lisse pur~protect essential daily moisturizer spf 30 (I totally used up the last Pur~lisse I got).

If you’d like to try Ipsy – click here. I’ll earn 250 points if you sign up through my link.




So I picked the cloudiest day in a month to try out another Funky Fingers solar polish…just my luck.

This is Funky Fingers “Cowabunga”. Indoors, it is bright ass hot pink. For a cheap polish, it went on like a dream. After the Revlon Quick Dry Base Coat, the first coat went down smoothly and almost gave full coverage. I went with a second coat and it was still smooth and even – no pooling in the edges! I used Ulta “Pinata Yada” on my party nails. I finished up with Revlon Quick Dry Top Coat for super shine.


The sun came out for a few minutes and I ran into the back yard and raised my clenched fist up to the sun. I ran back to the porch and took a picture as quickly as I could.

I was hoping for a deeper red, but it looks more like a pinkish tomato. “Cowabunga” is much less impressive than “Gnarly, Dude”, but it still changed. I MUST return to Five Below for more!


Pink Flaming-toes


Ba DUM dum…

I know, I know, it’s a really bad pun.

I just wanted to show off Julep “Vicki” next to some REAL pink plastic flamingos. I used Sally Hansen “Fruit-Ta-Ta” as an accent on my middle toes. Pretty good match, huh?

I actually just took “Vicki” off my toenails. It was too thick around the edges and the Sally Hansen Diamond Flash left ragged edges. I couldn’t go on vacation with my toenails looking all raggedy. I went back to Zoya “Sooki”, my new favorite toenail polish.


Nudist Colony


I LOVE lip stain…it stays put all day. So why not a lip balm stain?

I had a $1 off wet n wild coupon, so when I was at Target I picked up a wet n wild megaslicks Balm Stain in “Nudist Colony”. The name alone pulled me in…

Why do my pink flamingo nails look orange? We replaced all the lights in our house with compact florescent lights. I love how much money I save on electricity, but the lights make every picture I take of my fingernails look orange. That’s why I take most of my pictures outside on my patio. I have a wrought iron fence and all my neighbors can see EVERYTHING. I bet they think I’m a loony, arranging tableus of fingernail polish on my patio table every other day. Eh…