Month: April 2014


One Week


One week…this manicure has to last one week. So I chose the flashiest, yet longest lasting look from the past few months.

See, I have a business trip in Chicago, leaving tomorrow on a 5:55AM flight. I won’t be back until late Thursday night. Most paint jobs would last that long, except I turn around Friday morning and drive to Dallas for Texas Frightmare Weekend – our yearly girls’ trip. I may have time to paint my nails at the hotel, but then again, I may not feel like it…but I can easily touch up chips with more glitter. I’ll be back Sunday, but I may not feel like painting my nails then either….so…ONE WEEK. Can I handle that?

Whereas I used Artmatic “Dusty Rose” on the original, I used 2 coats of Julep “Jennifer” as a base. The difference is like the difference between buying “nude” pantyhose vs. “Suntan”. Or maybe Katy Perry in a rhinestone bodysuit vs. Britney Spears? The glitter is essie luxeffect “Set in Stones”. The TSA better not steal it out of my luggage…it’s THAT valuable.


May Julep Maven Box – The Fresh Twist Collection


 This is the earliest I’ve ever gotten my box – thanks, Julep Maven!

 Several months ago, Julep offered the opportunity to “crowdfund” (think IndieGoGo or Kickstarter) their new invention – the Julep Plié Wand™. I paid for my May box in advance, in order to ensure the successful launch of this product. It’s a novel idea. Those who know me, know how much I struggle with painting my nails – for the most part, I have a “spray and pray” philosophy. If I screw up, it will always peel off in the shower the next day. With the Plié, I may not have that problem any longer? Looking forward to trying it out…

Here’s the description from the site:

Julep Plié Wand™: An ergonomic nail polishing tool designed to bring more control, accuracy, and fun to every polishing experience. The weighted handle twists, pivots, and bends, making it easy to polish with either hand.
Plié Overcap: Fits over any Julep nail color and magnetically interlocks with the Plié Wand.
Precision Brush: Features a shorter stem that allows you to polish closer to your nail.

May’s theme is “The Fresh Twist Collection”, with another set of Spring colors. Again, I denied the “It Girl” box and went with “Boho Glam”. In addition to “Jeanne”Jet-set blue crème, and “Paulette”Golden lilac tulle shimmer, us Crowdfunders received “Yumi”Pink, silver and holographic glitter. It matches the other two perfectly.

Julep truly listens to their customers, because just this morning, I got an email announcing that we will be able to customize our boxes starting next month. Of course, the price goes up to $24.99 monthly, but you can still get the $19.99 price if you pre-pay 3 months at a time. This might be one of my favorite boxes so far, but now that we can customize our boxes – every box will be my favorite!

Not a Julep Maven? CLICK HERE to join! Your first box is free with code FREEBOX!


Gymnast Nails

A post shared by Lara (@knobbygirl) on

Lily had her first Gymnastics Show today, so I decided to get all Pinterest-y and paint her nails to match her leotard. She usually paints her nails herself, so I was afraid that I would have to tie her to a chair to let me paint her nails. Turns out that all I had to do is bribe her with Hotel Transylvania and candy.

I put on one coat of Ulta “Fuchsiamania” and topped with China Glaze “It’s a Trap-eze”. They dried relatively quickly, so I didn’t have to get out the quick dry drops.

 “It’s a Trap-eze” has a milky white base. It’s really an odd formula, but I like how it muted the fuchsia to create a lighter pink. Even so, I don’t know how I feel about actually trying it on my own nails…

Oh…and despite what the picture shows, my daughter does have 5 fingers. I don’t know what the hell happened to her pinkie.



Cold, Hard Betrayal


This is what COLD, HARD BETRAYAL looks like.

Dr. Goddess suggested a manicure that depicts cold, hard betrayal and this was my brainstorm – the bleeding cracks represent broken trust. Deep, huh?

Actually, I just put a coat of Julep “Glenda” over my Arrest Me RedSinful Colors “Under 18” and Sally Hansen Gem Crush “Cha-Ching!”. I finished with Julep Freedom Polymer Topcoat.

Of all the crackle coats I’ve tried, I think I like Julep’s the best. Sally Hansen is goopy, Revlon doesn’t work and OPI is unpredictable. I wonder how “Glenda” would look over chunky glitter?


I’m a Sinful Glitterwhore


I wanted a coke, so I spent my lunch break at Walgreen’s…

I am so full of shit, I can taste it. I just wanted some more cheap fingernail polish…because I am a glitterwhore. Oh, and Easter Candy is now 75% off – more Russell Stover Eggs, Ghiradelli squares and CHOCOLATE COVERED PEEPS.

I picked up 3 glitters from Sinful Colors – “Nail Junkie” (an apt name for my illness and this blue glitter), “Bombshell” (reminds me of the beach – gold and aqua glitter, with a little bit of pink) and “Call You Later” (Shamrock green glitter).

My husband wants to paint a car with “Call You Later” – he sheepishly admitted it to me when he was inspecting my purchases. How many bottles of polish would it take to paint a car???


Arrest Me Red


When in doubt, ask Facebook.

I put it out there last night that I couldn’t decide what color to paint my nails and the first response that I got was “Arrest Me Red” – which sparked my trip to Walgreens to find a “better” red than the dozen or so I already had…so THIS is what “Arrest Me Red” looks like. I used Sinful Colors “Under 18” and Sally Hansen Gem Crush “Cha-Ching!” for the party nail.

I actually used to drive an “Arrest Me Red” 2001 Mercury Cougar. I never got arrested while driving it and I only got one speeding ticket in it…but, to be fair, I was speeding so much, that I couldn’t even take Defensive Driving to get out of the ticket (92 in a 65). I blame Pantera, not the car. Listening to Pantera gets your ass in TROUBLE.


Sinful Shopping


I don’t always shop at Walgreen’s…but when I do…I buy a bunch of shit I don’t need.

I couldn’t resist Sinful Colors Nail Polish on sale for 99 cents (It’s $1.99 usually – still pretty cheap, even though it’s as good as OPI). I picked up “Under 18” (deep shimmery red), “Sugar Sugar” (an even deeper shimmery red, with microglitter) and “Starry Night” (black with silver holographic glitter). They didn’t have my BFF’s favorite color – fuchsia glitter in black polish…I WANT it.

I needed more red polish – I only have a dozen or so bottles!

I also picked up a bunch of clearance Easter candy: Speckled Jelly Eggs for my husband and chocolate for me – Ghiradelli Squares and Russell Stover Eggs. Mmmmmm…


Minty Fresh Nails


As I was squirting it onto my toothbrush last night, I was struck by how well my fingernails matched my toothpaste. My toothpaste even has mini bright strips that mimic the glitter on my thumb and ring finger. If you’re interested…Colgate MaxWhite with Mini Bright Strips. As far as I can tell, those strips don’t do shit.

My minty look is 2 coats of Zoya “Dillon”, with Zoya “Monet” on my “party nails”. (Doesn’t “party nail” sound so much better than “accent nail”?)

This minty color is EVERYWHERE. My favorite candle – Bella “Island Moonlight” – is this color. There was a Hyundai this color behind me on the highway on the way home…why do I feel so paranoid all of a sudden?


Easter Shopping


Remember when stores used to be closed on holidays? Easter is one of the few holidays that still closes some stores – HEB and Target are closed today, but Ulta was open. Do a lot of people go buy makeup after Easter Sunday service?

I got a ladyboner yesterday when I got an Ulta sale mag in the mail yesterday. Most of it was fragrances for Mother’s Day, but there was one special that caught my eye – Buy 2 Zoya polishes and get a free Zoya “Monet”, a multi-colored, cellophane holographic special effect topper. Plus, I still had a $5 off $15 coupon. I picked up “Cassedy” (full-coverage celestial pewter metallic from the Zenith Winter Collection) and “Dillon” (full-coverage green mint metallic with silver shimmer from the Awaken Spring 2014 collection). I also got a sample of it’s a 10 miracle leave in product – what does that even mean?

I couldn’t wait to try “Monet”, so I used it on my middle fingernails, over Julep “Tatum”. NOW, my Easter Grass nails are complete.


Easter Grass


Doesn’t Julep “Tatum” look like Easter grass?

Easter grass is verboten in our house…if you’ve never pulled a strand of Easter grass out of a feline’s bunghole – you don’t know what you’re missing! Trust me, they like it even less than you do…

In lieu of Easter grass, I’ll make do with Easter grass nails…