Cheetos Fury

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A post shared by Lara (@knobbygirl)

I have never had a product leave me so angry in my entire life.

I was school shopping with the kids a few weeks ago and I got dragged into Claire’s. This set of Cheetos Scented Nail Polish ($12.99) caught my eye…I know I already have several cheese scented nail polish – a great Sinful Colors one and a nice Nails Inc. x Velveeta set that I just got…I love weird smells, okay? So I bought the nail polish set and was looking forward to trying it.

A few days later, I got around to trying the polishes. I started with Glisten & Glow Ridge Filling Base Coat, and then started painting…I was dismayed to find that these polishes ARE scented, but they don’t smell like cheese at all. THEY ARE ORANGE SCENTED. That’s right, dear reader, these Cheetos branded nail polishes smell like orange Fanta. Look at the packaging again…is there ANYTHING on there that would indicate that the polishes do not smell like Cheetos?

Cut to bedtime…I’m washing my face and I catch a glimpse of my fingers…it’s been hours since I painted my nails, but the polish has turned to gel-like globs and is mostly in the sink. What. The. FUCK. It was like that scene in Poltergeist, you know the one where the guy peels his face off and it’s there in the sink? Turns out, this is little kids nail polish…you know, like that peel-off Avon shit that we all had as kids. I just threw it all in the trash. I just…I get teary eyed just thinking about it.

Do. Not. Buy. Nail Polish. At. Claire’s.