Tag: Not Your Mother’s

 
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Target Beauty Box – August 2018

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So…does my box look a little…wilted…to you?

When I pulled this month’s box out of the mailbox, it was rather moist. I thought it was due to rain earlier in the day…I was wrong. The moist-ness was coming from inside the box! It was the Not Your Mother’s Beach Babe Soft Waves Tropical Banana Sea Salt Spray. The bottle is now half empty and everything in is smells like fake bananas. Bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.

I cannot stand banana scented crap. If Lily doesn’t want it, this shit is going into the trash.

Also in this month’s box: Simple Kind to Skin Cleansing Facial Wipes (great for correcting eye makeup); Acure Brilliant Brightening Day Cream (another great brand); bliss Fab Foaming Face Wash; Eden BodyWorks Coconut Shea Body Lotion; and Schick Intuition F.A.B. Razor (5 bi-directional blades that shave forward AND backward – sounds dangerous!).

Other than the leaky sea salt spray, this is a great value box for $7. As usual, free shipping, 5% off with my Red Card and a $3 off $15 coupon.

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Influenster Vox Box – Rosy Vox Box

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Ooooooh! I finally qualified for a good vox box from Influenster. (I received one with coupons for gluten free stuff a few months ago. No. Thank. You.)

I was most excited to try the two Vera Wang Embrace fragrances in the box. Rose Buds and Vanilla is my jam. It’s a very mature rose scent, reminiscent of Cartier Goutte de Rose. I likely will buy it when I can find it in a store (not at Ulta or Sephora yet – I checked. The other scent is Marigold and Gardenia, also very mature…but not in a good way. I wore it all day yesterday –  that powdery gardenia scent is not for me.

Also in the box: Fancy Feet Ball of Foot Cushions (I’ve pretty much given up on heels, but these might make them more comfortable for me…and an excuse to go shopping); Secret Clinical Strength Deodorant (I’ve never felt like I am particularly stinky or sweaty, but a good deodorant nonetheless); Not Your Mother’s Beach Babe Soft Waves Sea Salt Spray (I have sooooo many sea salt sprays, but they work so well to add a wave with a simple hair twist); and Purell Advanced Hand Sanitizer Naturals (I admit, I don’t use hand sanitizer if I can help it – it makes my knuckles bleed…but I’ll be keeping it in the car for the kids).

Good job Influenster – I’ll likely be buying a full size of at least one product in the box…

As always, products were received complimentary for review purposes. Want some free stuff? Check out Influenster for yourself…

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Allure Beauty Thrills – December 2016

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I never did figure out who to call to change my address, so I had to wait for USPS to forward the box to me…and it wasn’t free – it cost me another $15.90 to get this last box.

The first thing I noticed is that this last box was TINY – about half the size of previous boxes. What the fuck, Allure? The boxes have gotten more expensive, but have less stuff. And the stuff is mostly weird brands I’ve never heard of.

Inside the TINY box: Arm & Hammer Truly Radiant Clean & Fresh Battery-Operated Spinbrush (No complaints – can always use a back-up); Arm & Hammer Truly Radiant Clean & Fresh Toothpaste (Also will be used); Cetaphil Moisturizing Cream; ChapStick Total Hydration Moisture + Tint in “Merlot” (another good inclusion); Dessange Professional Hair Luxury Oleo Miracle Replenishing Oil (my grandmother used to call margarine “oleo” – is this hair margarine?); Glov On-The-Go (I’ve been curious about these makeup removing mitts); an Invisibobble (looks like a telephone cord you put in your hair); imPress Gel Manicure (NO – I am NOT wearing press-on nails); KISS Salon Acrylic Nude French Nails (I guess my daughter gets two sets of fake nails); Not Your Mother’s Plump for Joy Thickening Hair Lifter (nope.); Redken Triple Take 32 Hairspray; Rimmel London Moisture Renew Lipstick in “Crystal Mauve”; Rimmel London Moisture Renew Clear Lip Liner (I do not see the point); Rituals Happy Buddha Shower Foam in “Sweet Orange & Cedar” (I got this in the last box – using this sweet smelling stuff in my shower now); Simple Skincare Hydrating Cleansing Oil (I wish I wasn’t grossed out by Cleansing Oil); WEN Hair and Body Care by Chaz Dean SIXTHIRTEEN Ultra Nourishing Intensive Body Treatment (if this stuff made my body hair fall out like the shampoo allegedly does, I’d be all over it); and Unwash Bio-Cleansing Conditioner (again, skeptical of these co-washes).

What a dinky box! I won’t be blindly buying the next Allure box that comes out – I’ll be reviewing the contents closely. SO disappointed in this box!

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Allure Beauty Thrills – August 2016

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So…we’ve been in the middle of a big move and I’ve been on hiatus for the last 10 days or so…but I haven’t stopped hoarding. I’ll never stop hoarding…I’ll just have to get more creative, since the new house is about 800 square feet smaller than my old house.

The first thing I must find room for…August’s Allure Beauty Thrills Box. I ordered for the whole year and it showed up on my doorstep a few days before my move. I haven’t even gotten to try any of it yet! Inside the suspiciously light August box: Arm & Hammer Truly Radiant Clean & Fresh Battery-Operated Spinbrush and Truly Radiant Clean & Fresh Toothpaste (I’m starting to rely on getting these in every box); Aveeno Pure Renewal Shampoo and Conditioner (it’s sulfate-free, which is good for my septic system); ChapStick Total Hydration Moisture + Tint Rose Petal (I love the ChapStick Total Hydration and I love Roses – I would have bought this if I hadn’t received it in this box); Grande Naturals GrandeLIPS (not sure if my lips need to be any plumper, but I’ll give it a shot); ittse Eye Shadow in “Obsidian” (another shadow for my new zPalette – oops, haven’t posted about that yet); Lumene Bright Now Vitamin C Sleeping Cream; Neutrogena Ultra Light Cleansing Oil (I bet this would ROCK with my Clarisonic); Neutrogena Norwegian Formula Hand Cream (I am guessing my husband will be getting this one to use after a shift on the tractor); Not Your Mother’s Double Take Dry Finish Texture Spray; One ‘n Only Argan Oil Treatment; Redken Diamond Oil Glow Dry; Rimmel London The Only 1 Lipstick in “Oh-So Wicked” (Oh, dark crimson); Rituals Happy Buddha Foaming Shower Gel (excited to try this!); RoC Retinol Correxion Deep Wrinkle (I haven’t tried the first one yet); RUSK Styling Collection Elixir Mist; Sally Hansen Miracle Gel Duo Pack – in “Flower Crown” – and Big Cuticle Oil; Simple Skincare Dual Effect Eye Make-Up Remover; Skinfix Daily Lotion; Toppik Hair Building Fibers (Uhhhhh…no); and WEN Spring Gardenia Green Tea Cleansing Conditioner (the one product I WILL NOT try…there’s a class action lawsuit alleging hair loss – FUCK THAT SHIT).

I have another box coming in December…I just need to figure out who to call to change my address!

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Allure Beauty Thrills – May 2016

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As a pleasant surprise, Allure Beauty Thrills offered a pre-order several weeks before the May box went on sale. They offered all three of this year’s boxes for $199.95, with free shipping. That’s a $20 premium compared to buying each box separately…but without the hassle of making the tiny ordering window – guaranteed boxes!

I was a bit worried when I lifted the box – it seemed WAY lighter than previous boxes. When I opened the box, it even seemed less full – lots more bubble wrap and paper. But there are plenty of products…they’re just smaller. Inside the May box: Hask Macadamia Moisturizing Shine Oil (I have SO many HASK vials); Burt’s Bees BB Cream in “Light Medium” (I bet this stuff is good) and Burt’s Bees Lipstick in “Magenta Rush”; ChapStick Total Hydration 3 in 1 Lip Care in “Coconut Hydration” (this shit is the BOMB – I used up the last one…who EVER uses up a chapstick?); Arm & Hammer Truly Radiant Battery-Operated Spinbrush (I already have one from another box, so I gave it to Lily) and Truly Radiant Clean & Fresh Toothpaste; Aveeno Absolutely Ageless Intensive Renewal Serum; Completely Bare Calm Down Ingrown Hair, Razor Bump & Redness Eliminator (perfect for summer crotch rash); Caress Mystique Forever Body Wash; Compeed Blister Cushions (I need these – I have a few shoes I’ve been avoiding); Coppertone CLEARLYSheer FACES SPF 30 (Definitely going to try this while out fishing this weekend); Degree Women Dry Spray in “Daisy Fresh”; Not Your Mother’s In A Heart Beat Blow Dry Accelerator; Pureology Pure Volume Style + Care Infusion (the tube is the weirdest ever – an inner layer and outer layer); Redken Beach Envy Volume Wave Aid (yup, more of it); Rituals Magic Touch Body Cream (that sounds almost TOO sexy); scünci Everyday & Active 3x Stronger Braided Elastics (LOVE these); Simple Skincare Micellular MAKE-UP Remover Wipes; Sonia Kashuk Double-Zip Clutch (It’s HUGE); Tangle Teezer Original Detangling Hairbrush (I’m gonna be chasing Little Orphan Lily around the house with this); TIGI Bed Head JOYRIDE Texturizing Powder Balm (the fuck?); and VersaSpa Gradual Tanning Face Moisturizer (a whole lot of NOPE).

I feel like I’ll be using more of the stuff in this box than in past ones…now all I have to do is sit back and wait for my August box to arrive.

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Target Beauty Box – March 2016

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This month’s Target Beauty Box is giving me “Vacay Vibes”.

So much stuff for just $5 this month! Inside my box: Clairol Hair Food Moisture Shampoo & Conditioner; Not Your Mother’s Texturizing Sea Salt Spray (I had stopped getting so many of these…but here we go again); Sinful Colors Professional Nail Color in “Poisonberry” (I don’t have this one – yassss!); Laneige Water Sleeping Mask (Always happy to get this product – will be gone in no time); Banana Boat Sun Control Comfort SPF 30 Lotion (Yup, need to start stockpiling sunblock for the summer); nügg anti-aging Face Mask; you are AMAZING Juicy Grapefruit Body Lotion (Mmmmm, smells juicy); and Caress Adore Forever Body Wash.

I wonder if I can use my $3 off $5 coupon on next month’s box? But then, wouldn’t I have to buy 3 of them?

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January Beauty Box 5 – Ev’rythang Done

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So Beauty Box 5 has gone full ghetto with the theme for January – “Ev’rythang Done”. Well, okay then…

So, I’m going to get ev’rythang done with Bodipure Keratin Gloves (Intriguing); Nails, Inc. Nail Polish in “Bruton Mews” (a deep, dark green – I don’t think I’ve ever seen a polish this color); Scratch Customer Accent Nail Wraps (These are supposed to work over polish); Novex Bamboo Sprout Deep Conditioning Treatment (I’m skeptical of this one – the foilpack says “bamboo sprouds”); Not Your Mother’s Haircare Plump for Joy Thickening Hair Lifter (Weird); and Salon Grafix Freezing Hair Spray.

After I keratin my hands, I’m going to paint my nails green and put gold stickers on them…then put bean sprouds in my hair…and then time for lifting and freezing. Then ev’rythang will be done.

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Allure Beauty Thrills – December 2015

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Just like last year, the Allure Beauty Thrills Box went on sale during Thanksgiving vacation. Again, I set my alarm and ordered. The price went up again – $49.95 now, with $10 shipping. Even so, it is a hell of a deal.

There were a few repeats from previous boxes, but loads of new stuff: Algenist Power Advanced Wrinkle Fighter Serum (easily the most valuable item in the box – $105 on Sephora’s site); Aloxxi Volumizing Whip (eh, I am SO past the mousse phase); Caress Daily Silk Silkening Body Wash (this is THE BEST for shaving your legs in the shower); Clear Scalp & Hair Total Care Nourishing Shampoo & Conditioner (going to my sister); Colgate Optic White Toothbrush + Built-In Whitening Pen (my third one); Colgate Optic White Express White Toothpaste; Dove Advanced Care Anti-Perspirant/Deodorant (still using the last one I got); Dove Deep Moisture Wash (another good one for leg shaving); e.l.f. Studio Lip Exfoliator (intrigued); e.l.f. Studio Moisturizing Lipstick in “Bordeaux Beauty”; HASK Monoi Coconut Nourishing Shine Oil (another repeat); Herbal Essences Naked Volume Shampoo (what the fuck am I supposed to do with shampoo and no conditioner?); Jessica Custom Nail Color in “Soak Up the Sun” (bright ass pink); Michael Todd Knu Anti-Aging Face Lift Serum ($58 on Ulta’s site); Not Your Mother’s Clean Freak Unscented Refreshing Dry Shampoo (Ugh); One ‘N Only Island Essentials Awapuhi Intensive Treatment; Redken One United Multi-Benefit Treatment (I LOVE the Blonde Idol BB Spray from my first Allure box – looking forward to this one); Rusk Working Spray; Simple Skincare Micellular Make-Up Remover Wipes; Sonia Kashuk Tools Medium Eye Shadow Brush No. 28 (I needed another blending brush); Suave Professionals Moroccan Infusion Styling Oil; Touch In Sol Feel Like Honey Moon Skin Base; and Yes to Tomatoes Detoxifying Charcoal Cleanser (Tomatoes and charcoal sounds like something you’d use to get out skunk stink).

All these high end wrinkle products – my face is going to be a smooth as a baby’s behind!

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Allure Beauty Thrills – May 2015

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Oh it’s been too long since the last Allure Box – 6 months! Even though I haven’t used up any of the products I’ve been using since the last two boxes, I need more…

This box is chock full of new stuff: Aloxxi Lightweight Sculpting Wax (oh HELL NAW); BIC Soleil Glow Razor (I doubt I’ll give up my beloved Mach 3 for this); Bioré Charcoal Pore Minimizer (LOVE their Charcoal line – using this tonight); Cetaphil Intensive Moisturizing Cream; Dickinson’s Original Witch Hazel Daily Refreshingly Clean Cleansing Cloths; Clear Scalp & Hair Active Damage Resist Ultra-Nourishing Shampoo and Conditioner; Colgate Optic White Express White Toothpaste; Colgate Optic White Toothbrush + Whitening Pen (got one of these in the last box and haven’t used it); Derma E Anti-Wrinkle Vitamin A Glycolic Cleanser (I got this in a Birchbox and just used it up yesterday – I love it!); Derma E Anti-Wrinkle Vitamin A Retinyl Palmitate Creme (Huh?); Dove Advanced Care Anti-Perspirant/Deoderant with NutriumMoisture (I am almost out of deodorant); Dove go Fresh Revitalize Body Wash (I am using the last one I got to shave my legs and I am almost out); Jergens Natural Glow Instant Sun Sunless Tanning Mousse in “Deep Bronze” (I’ll be giving this away); John Frieda Frizz Ease Nourishing Oil Elixir (Oooooh!); MD Complete Even Tone & Texture Accelerator; Not Your Mother’s Clean Freak Cleansing Conditioner; Physicians Formula Eye Booster Instant Lash Extension Kit (this scares me); Pond’s Rejuveness Anti-Wrinkle Cream; Revlon PhotoReady Eye Art Lid + Line + Lash in “Desert Dazzle” (my sister gave me one of these in a different color from her Allure Sample Society Box, but I haven’t tried it yet); Revlon Ultra HD Lipstick in “Gladiolus” (too orangey red for me); Secret Outlast Clear Gel (I don’t usually like gel deodorant, but I’ll try it); Suave Professionals Luxe Style Volumizing Weightless Blow Dry Spray; Suave Professionals Sea Mineral Infusion Exfoliating Body Wash; and Suave Professionals Visible Glow Self-Tanning Body Lotion (another one I’ll be giving away).

All this for $45.95 + $10 shipping! Even though I’ll be giving away about a third of the stuff, it’s still a great deal.

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Allure Beauty Box – December 2014

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Because I knew this season’s Allure Beauty Box would go on sale during my Thanksgiving vacation, I set an alarm on my phone to remind me to jump on the computer and purchase it…again, I was able to get this value-packed box of goodies – over $250 of stuff for $44.95 + $10 shipping.

Is it possible that this box is even better than the last one? Inside:  Aloxxi Conditioning Detangler (Lily might be getting this); Bioré Self heating One Minute Mask (I would have tried this out tonight if it wasn’t for a freak mustache wax accident this morning – don’t ask); Burt’s Bees Cucumber & Sage Facial Cleansing Towelettes (I totally used up the e.l.f. ones I got last time, so I know I’ll use these); Cetaphil Intensive Moisturizing Cream; Clean & Clear Morning Burst Hydrating Gel Moisturizer; Colgate Optic White Toothbrush + Built-In Whitening Pen (weird); Colgate Optic White Platinum Whiten & Protect Toothpaste (cool); Curel Skincare Rough Skin Rescue (the only duplicate from the last box – my husband already called dibs on this bottle to take to work); Dove White Beauty Bar (I didn’t know people still used bar soap?); Jergens Natural Glow 3 Days To Glow Moisturizer (I don’t need to be browner, so this will be gifted); John Frieda Brilliant Brunette Colour Protecting Moisturising Conditioner (this shit is my JAM); John Frieda Colour Refreshing Gloss for Cool Brunettes; John Frieda Frizz Ease Nourishing Oil Elixir; Neutrogena Boost Water Gel; Not Your Mother’s Whip It Up Cream Styling Mousse (do people still use mousse?); Organic Doctor Organic Manuka Honey Hand & Nail Cream; Organic Doctor Organic Virgin Coconut Oil Hydrating Radiance Elixir; Physicians Formula Nude Wear Glowing Nude Blush in “Rose” (YES, YES, YES); Rusk Texture Dry Finishing Spray; Sally Hansen Complete Salon Manicure in “Sweet Talker”scünci Hair Emergency Kit (my purse needs this); Shea Moisture Superfruit Complex Body Lotion; Splat hair Chalk in “Dusty Rose” (why not?); and Style Sexy Hair Dry Shampoo (yes, more dry shampoo).

My only disappointment was that there was no face wash! Now I have to go buy some fucking face wash!